CES 2017 brought all the geeks to the yard, but this year the fashion community flocked together to attend the nerdfest in hopes of cracking the next big thing in fashion tech. The result was surprises a-plenty—some good and some downright strange. While the next generation of wearables, augmented reality’s venture into the retail environment, smart fabrics (that respond to external stimuli) and Google’s Jacquard project give a promising picture of what the future beholds, some innovations have us questioning their validity. Here’s a list of the most bizarre offerings. We’ll let you be the judge of this.
Kérastase Hair Coach
To simplify things, this is a Bluetooth hairbrush by Withings. This device has in-built microphones, gyrometers and other sensors that pick up the data and tell you the right way to, erm, brush your hair. Clearly, you’re your hair’s worst enemy.
Denso Vacuum Shoes
If your mum has been nagging you to take off your sick platform sneakers when you’re indoors, then you’re in luck. Your first world problem now has a solution, thanks to the Japanese company Denso. Their latest invention is a motor-powered shoe that sucks up dirt and grit as you walk. Because who wouldn’t want to lace up tiny vacuum cleaners on their feet?
Digitsole Smart Shoes
The jury’s out on this one, but there might be something here. Digitsole makes “smart shoes” which comprises two models – one comes with an insole that doubles as a heating pad (goodbye achy feet) and the other has an adjustable heel that can be controlled with your smartphone. This means you can go from three-inch heels to flats without having to change your shoes and tote around a spare pair. Genius!
Essential Vibrating Connected Jeans
This is too good to make up, even for us. Spinali Design’s “essential” vibrating jeans have two vibrating sensors on the belt that connect with your smartphone via Bluetooth and perform a number of functions like navigating your way through the city (the jeans vibrates to tell you when to make a left or right turn), giving you notifications about urgent emails or text messages, and, like the website states, “fun features called “Ping” will satisfy those who want to interact with their surroundings through vibration that can be customized in terms of duration, frequency and intensity.” What could possibly go wrong with this?
Nike HyperAdapt 1.0
Here’s the thing – the self-lacing shoes in Back to The Future was a great concept. But when Nike decided to make an IRL version that ends up being the costliest pair of sneakers in the world (about 50K, to give you an idea), you start questioning if this is an essential feature after all. Sure, it’s cool to slip your feet into your sneakers and have them lace themselves up while you probably send out a text message or two in the interim. But is it really worth selling an organ for?